Sea Legs

A tripod my have been awkward to pack
but it would have been a welcome assistant
while photographing
lots of moving women
in low light
on a very rocky cruise ship

Cheeeeeeese

I used to think
cheese
gave me
an upset stomach.

So does the job of
photographer
for three days
on a cruise ship
with mostly
complete strangers.

Dead Ringer

No time for distractions today.

I was relieved the phone was quiet.

It was after 9pm when I realized...
the ringer was off.

Volume and control

It has been over a week
since the ability for me to play music
out of my computer
broke.

I am powerless...

I restarted the machine
and hoped for the best.

I restarted again.

and one more time.

I desperately needed to block out
the noise of the day.

I buckled
and interrupted a studiomate.

I asked him to come over and investigate.
I described my dilemma in detail.
I offered him my seat so he could examine the situation
completely.

He declined...

and casually slid the volume lever up.

Bent out of shape

I am bad at being sick...

but I am very good at
taking care of family
friends


and pets.

I Didn’t

Two Octobers ago
I got married in
an Elks Lodge.

The flowers were cheap
but beautiful

The food was delicious
but not fancy

The guests were exhuburant
but not in black ties

I'm on fire

I didn't recognize the number
I answered anyway.

The woman told me I had never used
a $174 massage gift certificate.

I asked her to repeat my name
I asked her to repeat the amount
I asked her if it was a joke

I told her I loved her

She's wrong
And I am very very lucky
today.

Attachments

When it is time to go through the piles
I feel no guilt throwing away
fistfuls
of barely used paper.

I even shred some

When the desk is finally clear...

I carefully line up
the four beautiful broken staplers.

Having a Ball

It was not a fierce competitive environment
for the Meatball Monday taste test.

It was more of a
Meatball Forum.

I use ground turkey, sausage, tons of good cheese,
lots of red pepper flakes, plenty of onion, some milk,
dijon, eggs and bread crumbs.

They went over well.

I like to make them.

I do not like
to eat them.

Basket Case

My $10 wager
ignited a rush of excitement
for all the games that are
the buzz in the studio.

I lost already...

day 2
of the 14 day tournament.

Over Drawn

There was no blank space
to note an appointment
for next week.

I had already
completely covered
the calendar page in
nervous and distracted
scribble.

Hat’s Off

It was so windy
and the day
flew by.

Well Prepared

I was early for my doctors appointment
and they were early too.

I wrote down all my questions ahead of time.
I asked one.

I arrived home
and it was still light out.

I cooked a meal
that would have been
delicious even without the butter
and heavy cream.

Out of Sorts

It is doubtful
the additional
laundry mountain
next to the hamper
will disappear
this weekend.

Back Stabbing

I blame the woman
that optimistically
lifted my legs
over my head
without my consent
for the lack of
movement in my neck.

Bar Back

All I want to do is
reach the bathroom
without anyone noticing
I'm not a patron
and yelling at me.

Why, why, why, why
is it so damn hard
to play it cool...
with a full bladder?

Gun Point

It is apparently traumatic
to shoot an animal
with a water gun.

Being awakened at 3am
for three nights straight
for a light snack...

is traumatic.

Frumpy Monday

My hair is not clean
or combed

My jeans are way
past their prime

I may have slept in
the shirt I am wearing

and the sneakers make it
official...

Bread and Butter Work

My most satisfying accomplishment
today was independently consuming
an entire baguette.

Re-tired

I am even more exhausted then
before I left for the relaxing retreat to the
planned community in Florida...

with lots of family.