Cheeeeeeese

I used to think
cheese
gave me
an upset stomach.

So does the job of
photographer
for three days
on a cruise ship
with mostly
complete strangers.

Dead Ringer

No time for distractions today.

I was relieved the phone was quiet.

It was after 9pm when I realized...
the ringer was off.

Volume and control

It has been over a week
since the ability for me to play music
out of my computer
broke.

I am powerless...

I restarted the machine
and hoped for the best.

I restarted again.

and one more time.

I desperately needed to block out
the noise of the day.

I buckled
and interrupted a studiomate.

I asked him to come over and investigate.
I described my dilemma in detail.
I offered him my seat so he could examine the situation
completely.

He declined...

and casually slid the volume lever up.

Bent out of shape

I am bad at being sick...

but I am very good at
taking care of family
friends


and pets.

I Didn’t

Two Octobers ago
I got married in
an Elks Lodge.

The flowers were cheap
but beautiful

The food was delicious
but not fancy

The guests were exhuburant
but not in black ties

I'm on fire

I didn't recognize the number
I answered anyway.

The woman told me I had never used
a $174 massage gift certificate.

I asked her to repeat my name
I asked her to repeat the amount
I asked her if it was a joke

I told her I loved her

She's wrong
And I am very very lucky
today.

Attachments

When it is time to go through the piles
I feel no guilt throwing away
fistfuls
of barely used paper.

I even shred some

When the desk is finally clear...

I carefully line up
the four beautiful broken staplers.

Having a Ball

It was not a fierce competitive environment
for the Meatball Monday taste test.

It was more of a
Meatball Forum.

I use ground turkey, sausage, tons of good cheese,
lots of red pepper flakes, plenty of onion, some milk,
dijon, eggs and bread crumbs.

They went over well.

I like to make them.

I do not like
to eat them.

Basket Case

My $10 wager
ignited a rush of excitement
for all the games that are
the buzz in the studio.

I lost already...

day 2
of the 14 day tournament.

Over Drawn

There was no blank space
to note an appointment
for next week.

I had already
completely covered
the calendar page in
nervous and distracted
scribble.

Hat’s Off

It was so windy
and the day
flew by.

Well Prepared

I was early for my doctors appointment
and they were early too.

I wrote down all my questions ahead of time.
I asked one.

I arrived home
and it was still light out.

I cooked a meal
that would have been
delicious even without the butter
and heavy cream.

Out of Sorts

It is doubtful
the additional
laundry mountain
next to the hamper
will disappear
this weekend.

Back Stabbing

I blame the woman
that optimistically
lifted my legs
over my head
without my consent
for the lack of
movement in my neck.

Bar Back

All I want to do is
reach the bathroom
without anyone noticing
I'm not a patron
and yelling at me.

Why, why, why, why
is it so damn hard
to play it cool...
with a full bladder?

Gun Point

It is apparently traumatic
to shoot an animal
with a water gun.

Being awakened at 3am
for three nights straight
for a light snack...

is traumatic.

Frumpy Monday

My hair is not clean
or combed

My jeans are way
past their prime

I may have slept in
the shirt I am wearing

and the sneakers make it
official...

Bread and Butter Work

My most satisfying accomplishment
today was independently consuming
an entire baguette.

Re-tired

I am even more exhausted then
before I left for the relaxing retreat to the
planned community in Florida...

with lots of family.

Pack it in

People I have not talked to in months
Projects that have been put on hold
Personal deadlines that seemed realistic

all surface

two days before a well planned vacation.

IN GOD WE TRUST

I immediately picture George Washington whenever GOD is mentioned.

I was 14 before the misunderstanding was corrected.

It was too late.

Weak end

The piles of paper
I planned to tame
this week
will have to wait
until Monday.

Lucky Day

Lucky, the dog,
is a perfect animal.

Night Cap

The last thing I need to do before I leave
is find the pens that go with all five lids...
and not one is even in sight.

From Dusk to Dawn

Yes, they call it a Hallmark Holiday...
but it is also an entire day
that I will not wash one dish.

Drifting

Snowy Mondays make it hard to focus on anything.

Shake Shake Shake

There is blizzard warning for tomorrow and Sunday.

I'm prepared to take complete advantage of this
snowed-in opportunity and get some bullshit done.

Good Reception

Tonight, I am heading to a party to
celebrate a local radio station's new studio.

Hopefully snacks will be prevalent.

I love the radio...commercials and all.
I like to know if the world is on fire while I
am in my studio making business cards.

Sun Rise

The little light my bedroom gets
makes for a perfect night's sleep
but a very difficult early morning.

A fan of Fontina

The aroma of the fancy cheese I bought last week
is still upsetting the studiomates this week.

Fake ID

I have pretended to forget to bring business cards to meetings for
almost three years now.

I riffle through my purse and say something about how I we create them
for all of our clients but I never remember to bring my own--a lie...

I proceed to scribble my information on a scrap of paper as legibly
as I can.

Sense of Direction

I like to tell people where to go...
when they ask me
and I actually know how to get there.

But I really I like to tell them
what to eat,
where to shop
and where to get a perfect
cup of coffee
once they arrive.

Eyed Shadow

I am grateful that I have been
to the Ground Hog's Day
celebration in Punxsutawney once
in 1995.

Today flew by working on
some cosmetic packaging
and I almost missed hearing
the reliable prediction.

Solo Performance

I have some very good friends,
but I would not subject any of them to
the Joni Mitchell Tribute Concert tonight.

I'm going all by myself

and I cannot wait.

Fish Food

I don't eat ANY seafood
but
Pepperidge Farm Goldfish
by the fistful.

Inside Out

It was 60 degrees out today
same as inside.
I wore my shirt backwards AND inside out.
The weather is as confused as I am...

Second hand information

As soon as anybody offers a compliment to something
I am wearing I immediately begin a lengthy story about
how the merchandise was discovered which ALWAYS
ends by me anxiously revealing the shockingly low sticker price:

Don't they look expensive, I got them used..and they were only $5!!!

They're plastic.
Can you believe Payless carries shoes that look this good? $29!!!

I never shop and when I do I can't find anything I like.
I bought THREE pairs for just $6o!!!

After the price has been revealed I give detailed directions to the store, write the name down if I have a pen handy and offer a bunch of encouragement to go out and do the same.

It's time for me to learn how to just say,


thanks.

Stop sign

Getting started
is always hard.

It's even harder
knowing when
to stop.

A simple soup

I thought a new place for lunch
opened up across the street.
I'll admit it...
I was pretty excited.
There is nothing to eat around here
so I pack food.
Today I packed nothing...

Through the window I saw
two men looking at a laptop,
a cake stand and lots of rolls.
I pulled the door handle HARD.
It didn't move.

DAMMIT

I went back to work

Later I watched the guys enjoy their
tomato vegetable soup from "the new place".

They knew to push.

In Sickness and in Health

I arrived home from San Francisco to a
clean house,
clean laundry,
groceries and
flowers.

I brought back a cold with a fever.

I give Zach all the credit for me getting better
it could have been much much worse.

Book ends

I am dreading my commute
now that I have finished my most recent novel.

I'm officially 30

I wheeled and dealed and got a hotel room for $70 a night.
I've scheduled almost every lunch, dinner, breakfast & happy hour
for my three day trip to San Francisco next week.
I wrote about my pleasure for purchasing plane tickets on this blog.
I have even thought about what coat to pack...

What I DID NOT DO:
Actually make a plane reservation.

I picked my flight and even chose seats,
but I never quite booked it.
It is still a mystery to me.
There is NO record of my reservation.

And it's a holiday weekend and
space is very limited
so I am greatful to be 30 . . . A
(the last window seat)

No interest

Time to talk taxes and year end already

and reality is setting in:
I am going to have to deal with the piles,
the overstuffed drawers
and so so many pieces of paper

Can Good

Got a new cell phone ONLY because my previous one shattered.
The updated model has a colored screen and a MILLION buttons.

TO DATE: I cannot even make a simple call.

My 2 cents

I hate hate hate hate HATE to fly.
However, I DO enjoy booking the plane ticket.
I even like making hotel reservations...
It is such a cut and dry process and not a real technical one.
There are no difficult forms to fill out or text heavy paragraphs to read.
And when the process is completed I really feel like I accomplished something.

Buying stamps online is a simularly satisfying experince.
Again, for some reason this task makes me feel productive.
Lately, I have been drawn to the antique planes.
I bought enough of them to last me for months.
Very productive. VERY Satisfying.

Too bad the rates went up.

Arrangements

Finishing off the secretarial duties of 2006 is much much easier with a vibrant bouquet of fresh flowers on my desk.

Gimme an A!

I never shop during the middle of the day. Today I had to run some errands and I found myself in the midst of the holiday markdowns on Broadway. I am a bad shopper, wracked by guilt.

But I need new bras and shopping for them almost seemed productive.

I know my size.
I know the sale price was truly a deal.
I know I require this highly engineered padding.

I selected a few and saw the velvet rope marking the line that was wrapping around the store.

I walked out with nothing realizing
size DOES matter.

Top Shelf

I can make a 3 to 4 course dinner in less then an hour if I am limited to even the barest of ingredients that remain in the cabinets, freezer and door of the refrigerator.

I panic when I am forced to make a decision as to what to prepare while I am at the grocery store. The options are endless. I over complicate and overdo the meal.

I find limitations freeing.

Why bother?

New Years Observed

trains are on a holiday schedule
no mail today
I was first in line to get coffee
not one horn honked during my walk in